Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Stuck in a funk.

It's confession time. I have to be honest with you: I'm stuck in a funk. And as much as I wish, this funk is not some groovy music that you can shake your tail feather to and get your partay on.

Blogging isn't as fun as it used to be. It's a struggle. I feel terrible that I am hardly writing articles, and sharing as much anymore. The main reason why I started this blog was so that I could have a voice, share my story and raise awareness. I feel like I am letting myself down and I feel like I am failing as a blogger and health activist.

To tell you the truth, I haven't been writing as much because of fatigue. I have so many posts planned in drafts, yet they remain unfinished because I'm either too exhausted or I find myself in the trenches of writers block.

I've been busy crafting and trying to organise my craft studio. I've also been battling horrid headaches which I suspect are side effects from the Vitamin B12 injections that I started last week (more on that later). I've been trying to get out more and get myself moving and exercising. I am fighting to stay positive and I am fighting to get myself back to work.

So when it comes to writing a blog post, I'm pooped! Fatigue is a great almighty biatch.

I thought it would be easier to post certain things on certain days but in hindsight I now realise that it's wasting just as much energy, if not more. Having set days for certain topics is actually restricting my writing and that's dangerous. Isn't hindsight a beautiful thing?

I will admit, as a blogger, sometimes I feel pressured and somewhat intimidated. There are so many blogs out there that are filled with fun, interesting articles and exciting stories. And I can't help but want to be one of those blogger's. But the thing is, I live with multiple chronic illnesses and in order to cope, I have to make sacrifices and priorities that other bloggers don't have to make.

The perfectionist in me forces me to sit down and produce some post but this unnecessary pressure I'm placing on myself is ridiculous, this I know. Surprisingly I have heaps to post about but I just don't have the energy. It's time I faced reality. I have to accept the fact that my blog will fall by the wayside from time to time.



Right now, I don't enjoy my blog and if I don't enjoy it, it's eventually going to show. I fear it already is. Blogging shouldn't be forced so things are changing here again at Chronically Creative (things are always going to change as I live with unpredictable chronic illnesses).

Here's how it's gonna go down in funky town:

*I will go (blog) with the flow and not force posts

* I will choose quality over quantity (right now quantity is winning)

* I am not going to fight, I am going to take regular breaks. Right now I'm posting virtually everyday. Crazy!

* As much as I hate it and it sucks, I'm getting rid of a few posts: Card making Monday,
Blab About Beauty Tuesday, The Nail Files Thursday, Crafty Fridays, Shabby Chic Saturdays and Scrapping Sundays are staying (but I'll only post when I feel I'm able too, they won't be weekly); the rest, aka, All about Me Monday, Thankful Tuesdays and Weekly Word Wednesday are going (I'll still be including things I would include in these posts, just not on a regular basis).

* I am going to make writing a priority instead of blogging. So instead of sitting down to smash out a post I'm going to take the time to work on just writing whatever I feel like and post it when I feel up to it. Slow and steady wins the race.

There. Time for a fresh start. It's time to get unstuck and get myself out of this funk.

On a positive note, I went for quite a long walk around a lake today and then smashed out this post- I'm as proud as punch! And no, this post wasn't forced, just in case you were wondering. Endorphins are good for writers block so I've discovered.






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5 comments:

Alanna said...

Good on you Emily for making the changes you need to ensure your well being :)

AND a huge kudos for the walk and a blog post :) Good on your girl!

Miss Chronically Creative said...

Thanks Alanna! Feeling quite terribe today though but boy was it worth it! x

with pen in hand said...

I know the feeling of being in a funk, wondering about blogging (and where it's going), wanting to have a blog "be" something,writing blogs in my mind (that never quite make it to "press", etc.
Do what you can, when you can. That's the motto I'm trying to live by (more successfully somedays than others, lol).
Glad to hear you have been out for a walk; hope your energy levels go up with the B12 and the headaches go away!
Good luck, and take good care of yourself!

phylor said...

oops, that got posted under an old, unused blogspot blog name and space. Should take that one down! Usually, it doesn't even show up as an option!

Miss Chronically Creative said...

Haha! I was a little confused for a moment there! So glad I'm not alone. It's hard some days just to get out of bed, let alone blog! I had my second vitamin b shot yesterday... so far no headaches so I'm hoping that it was just a side effect for the first week while my body adjusts.

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